failures | 021 [video] [backdated to late evening on the 10th]

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021 [video] [backdated to late evening on the 10th]

[A very cheery yet exhausted Larry appears on the screen. Behind him, the faint skyline of Goldenrod City can be seen in the dark orange of the sky. The steady noise of his Steelix moving along the ground can be heard. Larry's been on the move ever since he got done with today's adventures.]

I am on a roll, you guys!

[He holds up his newly earned Plain Badge for all to see. Hah, already ahead of Franziska again.]

Today was awesome! I got to challenge Whitney, and boy was that a fun match. Her Miltank is something else! But I beat her. And to get her to stop crying, I invited her to lunch. We did some sight-seeing and shopping too. She said she wants to do it again sometime! Can you say one of the best days in Johto ever? I guess it was a good thing I got dumped here again after all!

[He is stupidly happy over going on a date for the first time in months, yes. He desperately to get back in the groove of that.]

So um... I'm gonna head out of Goldenrod now. If I stay another day I think I'll never leave. It's like Violet, but waaay more entertaining. The only other time I went past Goldenrod was when I took that bus ride from hell up to Olivine for like...a couple days. I wanna see the rest of Johto and get the other badges. That was my main goal when I first got here. From here on out, it's about training and kicking gym leader butt!

Watch out Morty, Larry Butz has got his eyes on you!

[And from off-screen and out of nowhere before the feed cuts out,] Woooooooobbuffet!

Hey man, are you still stuck in Olivine? I'm headed for uh...Ecruteak I think it's called, right now. I think that's a town away from Olivine. I have no idea what happened a couple weeks ago, but I woke up in Goldenrod! I wanted to challenge Whitney and get that out of the way before comin' back up there.

Sorry for leaving you hangin'. [He really does sound sincere there.]

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No. I wanted to get back so I'm on Route 39. This place sucks.

[Apology noted but you're going to have to go through some complaining before he does anything with it.]

How long have you been there? I'm gonna try to get there A.S.A.P. I'll just skip Ecruteak for now.

Two days.

[By the way it's said, you can just tell this is the worst thing (thus far) to happen to Barney. Ever. Please rescue me Larry.]

Cool, I can get to you quicker now.

[Then his tone changes to something along the lines of determination.] Just keep truckin' Barney. You got this.

Thank God! Seriously Larry you need to come as quickly as you can. I don't know how much of this I can take.

[Between the flatland and the music and the murkrows...]

I don't think I got it this time.

Don't say that, man! I can't lose you now!

[Suddenly this has become a TV drama or something.]

Just hurry then. I don't want to die out here. Especially with all these birds.

[This is how pathetic Barney is right now. Only these two could create a drama out of this.]

Going as fast as Steelix can go. She's sure gonna get a big reward for all the racing she's doing right now!

[He laughs a bit at that, then pauses in thought.]

Y'know, now that you mention it...there are a lot of Murkrows around. It's kinda creepy.

You ever see The Birds?

Yeah! What a creepy movie that was.

[... Wait.]

You don't think the Murkrows are gonna pull something like that, do you?

Dude, with the way the birds are behaving and this place? I wouldn't put it past them.

Good point.

Well, at least we have our Pokémon to protect us?

Yeah, I guess that's a good thing.

[He's got a happy-go-lucky totodile, a pidgey that thinks he's an idiot, two Treeckos, one a fighter, one not, a shuppet that likes to play pranks, and an Aipom who alternates between high-fives and slaps. Bring it on Johto. Bring it on.]

Speaking of Pokémon, I meant to ask you somethin'. Uh... [He trails off for a moment.]

Were you still thinking of doing the trainer thing?

...[There's a long pause.]

I don't know, Larry. These past few days have been pretty rough.

[Larry figured Barney would say something like that. Convincing him to travel with him might be a little challenging...]

It'll be rough yeah, but it's fun too. Who knows, maybe there's another big city to see too!

[He gives Barney a reassuring smile.]

'sides, once I get there, you won't have to walk anymore.

[Once he "saves" your soul, Larry, he may like this whole hero thing and forge ahead. Regardless, he nods, mostly at the not walking part.]

How long do you think it's gonna take you? Couple hours?

Actually, I'm thinkin' a couple days... Johto's crazy huge.

Days? But we got to Olivine in like...a few hours.

... Good point.

[Another long pause.] Wait a sec, how the hell do they do that?! It's always taken me forever and a half to get between cities. Even on Steelix! Just...less in her case.

See, it's weird, right? It's like they've got some sort of time travel device or something.

Whatever it is, they need to share, man.

Maybe I could convince them somehow, if you know what I mean.

[Oh, he totally knows what Barney means.]

If anyone could do it, it's you, Barney my man. [... Literally.]

Let me find a Jenny.

Congratulations, Larry.

Thanks Ur! Any luck with the Blackthorn gym?

I had to take a break from it. One of my girls got sick and I have been takin' care of her until she recovers.

Ouch. That sucks. What happened?

She got a stomachache and the nurses were helping her. Nothing too bad, but I didn't want to leave her alone.

Yeah, I'd be the same way. I'd hate to see my guys sick too.

I promise to fight her soon.

Wait, it's a chick? I didn't know there was another 'sides Whitney and that Jasmine girl in Olivine.

Most of the people hasn't faced her yet.

Pooooint.

Invited her to LUNCH? Man, I wanted to kick her in the FACE after all that crying...

Well, it wasn't so bad since I knew it was coming and knew what I had to do.

Which was ask her out to lunch, huh?

Yup! Boy does she have expensive tastes...

Don't let her drain you dry.

I gotcha. I'm pretty used to girls with expensive tastes. [Unfortunately.]

_{[Poor Larry. Surrounded by gold-diggers.]}

Sounds like a bummer.

_{[BUT THEN, Heather doesn't exactly have much in the way of dating experience-- SO WHAT WOULD SHE KNOW.]}

It's not that bad. They were nice girls. Real nice.

[Larry just doesn't realize when he's being used.]

Still, though. Sucks.

_{[Heather doesn't necessarily doubt that they were nice, but she was raised to be frugal. Every penny counts when your dad is paranoid that you might have to uproot and move across the state at any moment.]}

As long as she was happy, it was worth it.

[WHY COULDN'T LARRY BE RAISED THAT WAY.

He's one of those types where he's so broke...yet he always manages to be able to afford expensive, unnecessary things for his date.]

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021 [video] [backdated to late evening on the 10th]

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